So What if I like Space Bunnies?

This is an article about Star Trek Online. Yes, I just wrote another one not too long ago, but apparently I have a lot to say about STO. Actually, I have a lot to say about STO‘s fan base and their vocal displeasure over some of the new content. Yeah, that’s a bit more accurate.

Now, I argued with myself about writing this article. I really did. After all, people who support and love a thing tend to get very vocal when that thing changes. So maybe it was just that, and things would calm down.

Plus, some of the complaints seemed valid. Sure, people complained that the Klingon faction had little content for it, ignoring the fact that it had a hand full of story missions, 7 playable races you could only play in the Klingon faction, a bunch of ships you could only fly as a Klingon, and the fact that Klingons were never the main focus of Star Trek to begin with. But whenever you make an ‘us vs. them’ type of game, someone is going to want to play the ‘them’. Plus, if you make a faction, you should flesh out that faction. So, okay, maybe that’s a fair complaint.

And people complain about Cryptic occasionally giving away stuff for free that they paid for. This is dumb because Cryptic never promises that things won’t go on sale or be given away for free, but I can see the upset.

Then there are the people complaining about lack of loot drops in the STF missions. Again, basic “THEY CHANGED THINGS!” complaints. Still, I have noticed a lack of credit income on my characters as I play, so it may be a valid concern. And while every single complaint seems to coincide with “AND THIS IS THE DEATH OF STO/CRYPTIC!”, I can write that off as simple internet hyperbole. Heck, I’ve even been trying to be nice, and ignoring how utterly and contemptibly rude so many of the forumites are (and seriously, STO forum guys. Many of you are seriously fucking rude). So what finally pushed me over the edge?

People complaining about these:

These are called epohhs. They’re critters that can be found running around New Romulus, the new content area. One of the missions involves catching and tagging them, and you get some rewards for doing so. Do it often enough and the reward is an epohh as a pet, which will follow you around in non-combat situations. Apparently, according to people on the STO forums, pets are not Star Trek. Never mind that Captain Archer had a dog, and the Klingon captain in Star Trek 3 had whatever the fuck that was, and Lieutenant Commander Data had a cat, and…

Yeah, forget all those pets. Pets are NOT STAR TREK!

And it’s especially not Star Trek for them to essentially be space bunnies, right? Because Star Trek has never had anything goofy that was only slightly different than shit you’d find on Earth. Throw in the way it makes fanboys rage, and the only thing that could possibly make it more Star Trek would be if they made the things out of recycled Roddenberries.

Look, people. Complain about stupid shit on the forums all you want. But by and large, forums aren’t the places developers look for what to change. The reasons for this are many, but on the most simple level, the people on the forums aren’t going anywhere. Oh, I know, I know. You’ve totally stopped playing, and you’re gonna cancel your account, and that’s money Cryptic is never gonna get from you ever. When I play pretend, I like to pretend I have a harem of chubby redheaded fairy women who serve my every whim. The fact is, if you’ve put enough time and energy into the game to search the forums, post about things that annoy you, and ask, nay, demand that the developers do exactly what you say, then you’ve put in too much time and energy to quit. They’ve already got you hooked.

The only thing the developers are going to listen to is what does and does not get played. Don’t like the new content? Don’t play it. Don’t like the STF situations? Don’t play them. Don’t log on. Stop talking about canceling your account and just do it. That’s what they will listen to. Not a typo-laden forum post entitled “DEV’S READ THIS NOW!”

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a character that needs to go catch space bunnies. She’s gonna carry it around in her purse and replicate a little sweater for it that’s color coordinated to the outfit she’s wearing. And the only part of that that won’t be 100% pure Trek will be the fact that she has a  purse.

So fuck you.