Violet Sucks and Now I Want Falafel

So, I’m sitting at work, doing my normal thing. You know, trekking through pipes, committing one-man turtle genocide, saving princesses, the usual. Right as I’m jumping hella high to grab a juicy looking coin, my phone makes a beeping noise. I didn’t notice it at first, because it’s so much like the noise made when I grab a coin.

When it beeped a second time, though, I stopped to check it. Who should it be but GeekParty’s own Violet, beeping me to chat on Facebook. Well, I’m an agreeable guy. Nice and friendly, or so people tell me. So I grab a red potion, make myself a little dimensional portal to hang out in, and chat. We talk about normal stuff. The weather, how things are going at work, her wish to grow a mustache as fantastic as mine. Nothing out of the ordinary, until she drops this bomb on me.

“Just had falafel with my boyfriend.”

Now I’m pissed. I can’t just up and leave work, but I’m starving and there’s not a power mushroom in sight. And let’s be frank here.  Power mushrooms are bland and tasteless in comparison to the wonder that is falafel. Deep fried chickpea paste, maybe placed on a slice of pita and slathered with hummus? How could you ask for a better meal?!

I’m soooooooo hungry!

As if that wasn’t enough, the woman had the gall to taunt me! She went on and on about how tasty it was, ignoring my pleas to ship some falafel down a warp pipe! Do you have any idea how tough it is to get falafel when I’m at work? It’s nearly impossible! So now I have to keep committing goombacide on an empty stomach, and it’s all Violet’s fault!

Any of you readers wanna bring me some falafel? I’ll make it worth your while. I’ll do things for it. You know. Things.

…Wanna ride my Yoshi?